Review: Is chocolate-infused cheese a revelation or just revolting?

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Is there such a thing as the Best of Both Worlds? You know the kind of thing: getting a massage while you’re watching the football; having a pint while your wife takes the kids shopping; pouring some cashews into your bag of crisps and then eating them both at the same time; or ditto, combining a strong nutty Cheddar with a square of dark chocolate.

WHOAAA, go back a sec. WHAT did you say? Not the football bit, or the shopping bit, or even the crisps bit – but the cheese and chocolate bit.

THAT’S not the best of both worlds, surely? That’s world’s colliding and cancelling each other out, surely? That’s an abberation, not a revelation, surely?

Well, there’s only one way to find out.

In the interests of investigative blogging I have been sent a slab of a new product called Reveleation, from the god people at the Truckle Cheese Company.

This had to be a Best of Both Worlds waiting to happen. That’s what I thought. I adore cheese; my wife adores chocolate. So cheese combined with chocolate was a sure-fire way of cementing our love. Gotta be, eh?

You know the song:

Love and marriage
Love and marriage
Goes Together Like, er,
Cheese and Chocolate

Something like that.

Anyway, here’s what it says on the packaging: ‘A unique blend of our delicious mature cheddar cheese infused with luxurious dark chocolate curls’.

Well, when you put it like that, it sound rather splendid, doesn’t it?

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But it just isn’t. It’s so wrong, it’s beyond wrong. I can just about tolerate cheese with pickled onions, cheese with apricots, cheese with cranberries, even cheese with chillies. But this cheese and chocolate malarkey is a combo too far. It’s not the Best of Both Worlds. The result is actually less than half of one.

It’s neither fish nor fowl – or to be more accurate, it’s neither cheese nor chocolate. The sum of the parts simply don’t add up. It doesn’t taste cheesy; it doesn’t taste chocolately. In fact, it almost tastes Marmitey (and we know what everyone thinks of that love-hate product).

I’m sorry, Truckle folks: the Revelation is not a revolution in cheese-making.

But, hey, if people didn’t try to come up with strange new things, we’d still be stuck in traffic on square wheels.

Besides, taste is subjective. One man’s hell is another’s heaven, and so to balance this review I’m including these testimonials from the Truckle Company’s website.

Angela Adams wrote: ‘Amazing! Just when I thought your delicious cheese couldn’t get any better I had a Revelation Cheddar gift. I would never have considered buying it but now I’m hooked! Thank you so much!’

Wendy Sarah Cullen added: ‘My husband and I tried your Revelation cheese at Ripley Castle Summer sale, he’d forgotten his spectacles so could not see the description. Result disbelief of combination. Conclusion, Wow! please may I have some more . .’

 Aaron Kemp said: ‘I would consider myself to be somewhat of a cheese lover of simple tastes. So when I purchased Revelation I was unsure if it would suit my palate. However I can honestly say that this is one of the finest infusions of flavour that I have ever tasted! Thankyou Truckle Cheese Co. for opening my eyes to this masterpiece.’

Which I guess means, for these tasters, Revelation actually is the Best of Both Worlds.

Thankfully, the Truckle Company has a lot more than chocolately cheddar on offer. This beautiful, tangy, creamy cheddar for example; or this amazingly balanced sweet-and-salty Stilton. Absolutely glorious. Just promise me this: Don’t stick any Dairy Milk or Black’s in there. It just doesn’t work.

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• This is a review of just three of the dozens of cheeses the Truckle Company has to offer. Why not visit their website to find out more.

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